I am at a critical point in my journey in which major aspects of my being are coming into question and I can't seem to find the answers to why I started down this road in the first place. Well, did I have a choice? The Hubby left me, I didn't leave him.
When it seems like every piece of my life seems to be pulling apart at the seams, God answered my prayers. Coincidence is when God chooses to remain anonymous.
A job offer from my former boss really helped in times like this because I really am in need of an extra thousand bucks every month to keep afloat. The Hubby no longer pays for maintenance and his share of the household expenses for some time.
Sometimes, things don't turn out exactly as you wanted, but you get better offerings in return. Having been offered an extra two thousand bucks a month is indeed more than what I expected. Alhamdulillah...
I have tendered my resignation with my employer and will be starting my new job in a very big government linked company and one of the largest conglomerates in the country on October 7. Looking forward to a new chapter in my life, I feel stronger and braver.
I suppose Mary Tyler Moore is right, "Pain nourishes courage. You can't be brave if you've only had wonderful things happen to you."
This poem says what's on my mind right now...
Yesterday and Tomorrow
By Marzuki
Yesterday I saw you
Walking and laughing with someone new
And I know that you saw me too
But I pretend that I was happy
I try to hide the feelings inside me
That sometimes I still cry
And the truth is inside I already died
You know I’d do anything for you
But not to love you is the only thing that I can’t do
I’d lost everything if I don’t have you
And what would life be if I have to go through
Those days and nights will be all blue
I walk in the misty shadows
Of our past memories that before this had grow
The young and passionate love is now rest peacefully
except remains of you that still haunting me
But I know one day I will forget you
As soon as my heart stops beating
And as soon as forever is through
I’ll be over you
Tuesday, October 01, 2002
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