Married but available

I talked to The Athenian Monk about what Misai Kucing was telling me about the prospect of marrying a married man. Fortunately for some and unfortunately for others, polygamy is legal and sanctioned in Malaysia, being a Muslim country.

I have heard that while you can choose who want to marry, you cannot choose who you love because love comes unexpectedly and catches you by surprise. What if you fall in love with someone who is married but available, and your love is reciprocated?

The Athenian Monk said, "That's part of life, I suppose. I've been 'in love' with others who are not available. After a few months the hormone level dropped and it was easier to let them live their life and love from a distance."

He advised me, nevertheless, "Well, if you ever become a second wife (touch wood), I would hope you are able to love the other woman and she in return love you. Or keep separate houses!" Perhaps, if such a situation can exist.

The Athenian Monk then shared with me part of his beautiful poem, which is still work in progress, "Love is the touch of another soul. Love is a rose given to a stranger. Love is responding to myriad cries to be held. Love is healing. Love is teaching. Love is a kiss hello, a tear when parting. Love transcends time and is not limited by space, by fear, but opinions. Love fills you completely and never brings anxiety, doubt, worry or humiliation. Love is touching a soul."

In the meantime, I'm still hoping to find someone who is single and available. Despite what he said about settling down for someone who is married but available, I should give my best shot to make it work with someone who is single and available.

He said don't marry a man because he is single and available, and don't reject a man just because he is married.